Okay, can we agree that the parents be fuckin’ up here? Crazy.

Okay, can we agree that the parents be fuckin’ up here? Crazy.

            Okay, when I was reading this, to say the least, INTERESTING story Emare I thought I was reading a child’s mentality, within a grown man’s body trying to pretend to be an adult and serve out the most ridiculous punishment known to man. And all was because he daughter, I repeat, his DAUGHTER refused to marry him?!?!? It is one thing to send your disobedient child to their rooms, or even taking away their cell phones or something, but no; “No food or water! No money, and here’s a boat. Sail away from me at once!!!!” Great parenting there buddy. Don’t ground her or anything.

 

            And now we have this mother-in-law to Emare that has me really irritated. Basically acting completely corner-working maiden-like, enticing the messenger with her clad self, and then changing the letter after their activities telling her own son that his wife gave birth to a monster, really unnecessary. Unfortunately for me and the way my brain works, all I could picture was Rapunzel’s fake mother, and her song “Mother Knows Best” kept running through my head. Welp, can never watch that movie again. No sir-e-Bob.

            Personally, I have never read a tale such as this really, especially with an incest motive by one character, weird. But one thing that I can sit back and appreciate in this tale is the newness in itself. I did not really see too many connections to what we have been reading to our ideals of medieval romance, with the exception of seeing a beautiful maiden and an almost immediate proposal, and the devastation that came to the rejection. But again, the incest motive was quite new. This was the first tale I found myself almost equally frustrated with having to read Middle English, simply because I could not understand the actions taken by these people. But hey, still kept me interested right? Right. Good.

That Thoroughly Raging Moment When the Author Totally YEETS Your Joy Near the End Of the Tale, and Your Smile Completely Vanishes Forever

That Thoroughly Raging Moment When the Author Totally YEETS Your Joy Near the End Of the Tale, and Your Smile Completely Vanishes Forever

                Yes, I know that Chaucer was not exactly trying to appeal to our ideals of a happy ending for the guy we were rooting for, when Pluto decides to throw Arcite into the black hole of horror with an earthquake, to SHOCKINGLY, please the will of a woman (goddess in this case).

Giving me personally, a reaction much like this one…

                Also, I just want to point out how funny it is to me that these two cousins were thrown into prison together, they had to look like this when they were being locked up…

                Forgive me with my Fresh Prince use, but how can I not?? Cousins?!?! Genius if you ask me. Plus this is when Arcite (Will) first laid eyes on lady Emelye... Look at that concentration.  

                The most interesting part of this tale to me, was that Emelye did not want to marry because she wanted to remain a virgin, or at least that is how I took it with her quote “a mayden al my lyf”, in the temple of Diana. It was interesting to me that in a time where women had so much authority of their King’s decisions (life or death), that Emelye still has to be wedded against her will, to one of either of these men, to whom neither has she spoken at all. Inconsistency runs throughout these tales and courtly love and all of that. Because is it not ALL of women’s desires to have control over their own lives, as stated in The Wife of Bath’s Tale?? ALL WOMEN?!?!?! Just sayin’.

                It was actually a really depressing end for me, as I stated in my delightful title, but the King’s speech about death was actually quite appropriate to the text, given the situation the King finally took a role of comfort, not only for Emelye, but for all of his kingdom as well that was shaken by the death of Arcite. I enjoyed reading this tale, again, not in this middle English crap. But I guess I will have to get over it. But I am curious, when did the Greek God's decide to play such a role in this tale and none of the other? Very curious.

Thank you.  

 

Hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husband because Lancelot(AKA: reincarnated Equitan) is snatchin' everybody out here!!!

Hide your kids, hide your wife, and hide your husband because Lancelot(AKA: reincarnated Equitan) is snatchin' everybody out here!!!

           

 Can we talk about the fact that Lancelot just pulled the exact same move as king Equitan by taking the love of queen Guinevere from her king Arthur? Courtly love just cannot stay away from these people, luckily I just wrote to MY king about this issue!! Although it cannot go without mentioning the endless courage and independence that Lancelot had to acquire that love. ENDLESS injuries this man took! Breaking bars in order to get down to the good stuff? Crossing sword bridges and taking off his in order to GET injuries to prove himself? That's a real man right there. You would not find this man dying from a feet-first dive into boiling water!

            Also what was getting on my nerves were the constant mind changes that queen Guinevere made when Lancelot had been confronted with the decision to hop in the cart, she was upset for his hesitation? Why? It is not exactly easy to make that kind of decision to be publically shamed. But when it was all said and done she just forgave him for his decision. And then she told Lancelot to start to lose to prove that he loves her, and then goes "okay okay never mind go win this fight!!" this girl needs to make up her mind. Lancelot not only has the strength and courage of no other, but also the restraint that surpasses anyone for having not flipped out on Guinevere.

The final bloodshed of the final battle was one to behold and how we finally did not have to wait for whatever could possibly go wrong and keep us reading another twenty pages. Honestly I was surprised that Lancelot was not the first one to lose an arm or even a leg between any other character in this story.

            This story really was a fascinating read, although it took every ounce of energy within me to read its entirety. If we continue this path of all of these stories has taken us, I think we will have the immortal knight among the mortal competitors and falls in love with the mortal with goddess-like charm, otherwise known as Hercules?? Whaaaaa?

 

YOU DO NOT WANT THIS SET OF WHEELS, YA NO-HONOR-HAVIN'-ASS

YOU DO NOT WANT THIS SET OF WHEELS, YA NO-HONOR-HAVIN'-ASS

By: Rory Conklin

            The Knight of the Cart was definitely an interesting read for me personally, mainly because I could not for the life of me follow what was going on!! It seems like my opinion was shared greatly by my fellow classmates that the continuing mentions of nameless characters, just left us all wondering whom was talking and when! left me totally confused and quite frankly frustrated in what truly was going on. Personally I like to visualize in my wonderful imagination what really goes down in this story, but I found myself simply only imagining the vivid scenery described but without the faces of who exactly was talking, or who was the center of attention. Just a bunch of knights and their armor that covers them.

            The most interesting part to me in this story was the significance a cart played in the society to the knights and the dwarfs themselves. "Like out pillories, carts served for murderers and robbers, for those found guilty in trials by combat, for thieves who had stole the property of others or seized it by force  on the roads" (174). The dishonor that goes along with having this cart made me think about how possibly the cart represented the public's judgment on these people that were convicted of such crimes, and that the cart showed their inability to achieve anything on their own, such as walking and why they need a mobile cart. This is what showed their dishonor and that they were not independent enough to make it on their own in the world, but rather take from others. Take a cart to make it easier on themselves rather than walk and earn their stripes. 

            How people thought of one another really had a major impact on the lifestyle back then, much like in Erec and Enide, where you were critically judged and forced to reflect on your own actions, and make the self realization that you must do whatever it takes to prove a point. 

I DO NOT KNOW WHO TO TRUST IN THESE LAIS!!!!

I DO NOT KNOW WHO TO TRUST IN THESE LAIS!!!!

By: Rory Conklin

            Okay, it goes without saying that the present day world we live in is one not to be well trusted in the hands of others. But after reading three short lais; Equitan, Le Fresne, and Bisclavret, my eyes have been opened even wider as to how sick and twisted these people were, and how little trust was actually appreciated and upheld by anyone, even within the bonds of matrimony does it mean nothing to these people. It was well put in Le Frense, and what turned out to be in my opinion the main theme to these lais, "Whoever slanders another never knows when it will rebound on him" (Le Frense, 87-88). The biggest karma statement ever and it showed to be true! Whether it had been about spreading rumors or just plain and simple adultery, it always came back to haunt them or seal their fate.

            Starting with Equitan we return to the adultery and hierarchy playing a significant factor. At first the wife tries to defend the love of her husband and claims that any love between her and the King would be forced and unforgiving in the long run. But in a few short pages she went from the cliché "oh woe is me, I am not worthy" nonsense to basically an "Eh, alright let's do it" with the King.

 

And then to top it all off plans to KILL her husband the seneschal!!! I FOUND THIS RIDICULOUS. I did get a kick out of how the Kings life was ended however, a foot-first dive into the boiling water and an instant unforgiving scalded death. Classic!!! Karma you art thou a heartless bitch, but hey they were asking for it am I right?

            In the lai, Le Fresne, I did not find this story nearly as annoying, but rather ironic and simply weird how okay everyone was at the end when the Knight was marrying his mistresses long lost sister, but then they found out and practically said "Whoops! Start over! Marry her instead" because after all Fresne was royalty and that is all that matters right? I find that love in these lais do not mean a damn if a rich and powerful ranking in the classes was not completely behind the decision making. Everyone was just a go with the flow until a call needed to be made. Can anyone explain to me why everyone was so calm and forgiving at the end? If I had been Le Fresne I would have been asking a million questions.

             

And finally, the one girl that did not jump in excitement to the idea of being married to a werewolf. Just her!! Okay maybe that is an overstatement. But its moments like these, the lai of Bisclavret where you would think love would triumph over minor, although difficult to believe, circumstances such as your husband turning into a werewolf for three days a week. Okay, again this is a little supreme. However, this goes back to what my main point was, how does anyone trust anybody in these times? When will they learn that karma almost always comes back around, like how the werewolf bit off his wife's nose, and then later she gave birth to nose less offspring?? It is pretty obvious that someone was not taking their couples therapy seriously.

            Overall these were very entertaining reads, and definitely gave me something to think about when I am bored!